Judging & Criticizing Others: How To Destroy Your Own Happiness


Judging and criticizing others is the easiest way to destroy your own happiness. Can you imagine a world where everyone was accepting and loving towards one another? Despite our best efforts, we have all been guilty of judging and criticizing others at some point in our lives.

In the past, I indulged in these behaviours, which in turn, negatively impacted my happiness in life. Judgment and criticism is merely a projection of your own insecurity and lack of fulfillment in life. It wasn’t until I was 100% happy with whom I was that I no longer felt the need to judge others.

In the words of Carl Jung, “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” How much time do you spend judging and criticizing others?

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If you want to be treated with unconditional love, you need to give that love to others. Nobody is perfect, and that includes YOU. Would you want someone to do or say something that hurt you? I doubt it.

If you love and honour yourself, you won’t dishonour or show hatred towards others. Happy people never judge or criticize people. Rather, they focus their energy on lifting people up and serving the greater good. They want to create more happiness, because that is what brings them a sense of joy.

If you struggle with judging and criticizing others, I challenge you to look deep inside of yourself in order to determine why you are choosing to act in this way.

When you shift your thoughts from ones of judgment to acceptance, towards yourself and others, you will restore your sense of happiness and fulfillment in life.

Below are 3 strategies that will help you release your judgmental thoughts, so that you can live more in alignment, with yourself and others:

1. Be Mindful Of Your Thoughts

Learning how to become mindful is a critical step in the process of becoming free of judgment. The root cause of judgment and criticism is the ego. The ego compares the self with others, and puts others down in order to feel better about the self. This becomes a vicious cycle, with the end result being a lack of acceptance, love, and joy.

When you find yourself being judgmental, step back and monitor your thoughts. What can you learn about yourself, based on how you are acting towards others? In the words of Earl Nightingale, “When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.”

2. Practice Self-Love

The more that you judge yourself, the more that you will judge others. Showing love and compassion for yourself is the best recipe for a happy and fulfilled life. Discipline yourself to practice self-love, by thinking and acting with positivity and non-judgment.

In the words of Brene Brown, “Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love.” When you love yourself, you transmit that same loving energy to others as well.

3. Send Love To Others 

Whenever someone is projecting criticism or judgment onto you, send him/her love. This is a ritual that I practice in my daily life. I think that compassion is the ultimate antidote for peace, harmony, happiness, and wellbeing. Nonjudgmental people possess an abundance mindset, which flows out of a deep inner sense of personal worth and security.

These people exude happiness. They are compassionate for others’ misfortunes and show praise for their successes. When you show compassion and send love to others, you are committing to supporting the highest good of all mankind. Let go of your ego and stop judging and criticizing others.

Make it a priority for all of your intentions in life to be comprised of love and kindness. As the Golden Rule states, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” I hope I have inspired you to make a shift towards living a more happy and fulfilled life. Are your actions contributing to more peace, love, and joy? If not, it’s time to make a change.

In the words of Sri Chinmoy, “Judge nothing, you will be happy. Forgive everything, you will be happier. Love everything, you will be happiest.”

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Judging & Criticizing Others: How To Destroy Your Own Happiness
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  • Christoph Fässler

    Awesome content and truth Stefan, thanks for sharing! I’ve been guilty of that so many times too and this is really – i think – the best and only way to make steps in the right direction! Send love – i love that! You’re awesome, don’t stop doing what you’re doing! Chris