What does it take to be really happy and fulfilled in your life?
Will it take making a certain amount of money, quitting your job, getting in incredible shape, or finding the partner of your dreams?
The truth is, most people are delusional about happiness. We've been conditioned and programmed to believe that happiness is something that comes from outside of us, in the form of success or achievement, when it couldn't be further than the truth. The only thing that achieving external goals will give you is a sense of momentary pleasure, but it will never lead to lasting fulfillment.
The truth is, happiness is something that's already inside of you. It always has been and always will be. In fact, I believe happiness is our natural state of being – but it's only through the conditioning of society that programs to believe otherwise. It's only when we become aware of the conditioning and stop chasing happiness, that we really have the ability to find it within us.
In this video blog, I share openly and honestly my experiences with finding happiness in my life. Below, I'll also share some practical ways that can help you to find more joy, happiness and fulfillment in your life right now.
Watch the video below:
(Click here to watch on YouTube)
My Personal Experience With Happiness
When I was younger, my parents used to always fight about money. Not having any was a huge cause of stress and pain in my family.
As a result, I linked up in my brain that not having money equals pain. I also deluded myself into believing that by making money and being successful, that I'd finally get to be happy.
I didn't just believe this with money, but in other areas of my life as well.
I remember vividly believing that once I got out of high school and graduated, that I'd finally be happy.
Nope, I was wrong. I wasn't any happier.
I then convinced myself that by getting a good job and being able to make money, that I'd finally get to be happy.
Nope, wrong again. Wasn't any happier. In fact, I ended up hating my job, just like I did with high school.
Maybe if I bought a car? What about if I moved out from my parents house?
Nope… still not happy.
Hmm, what if I got a girlfriend? Had more friends? Got in amazing shape?
Again… still not happy.
What if I made hundreds of thousands of dollars, quit my job, became financially free and travelled the world?
YES! Finally, this made me happy…
… for a while.
It didn't last. It was cool and exciting for a little while (just like all of the things above were), but the truth is, those feelings eventually went away.
I continued on with this cycle, as we all do, believing that it's by having something MORE that would finally make me happy.
It wasn't until I had this breakthrough that everything started to change for me…
It's About The Journey, Not The Destination!
I know you've heard this all before. Heck, I've heard and “knew” all this stuff for years from all the self-help books that I read.
But there's a difference between KNOWING something and really LIVING something.
It wasn't until I really started to achieve major success in my life and reach all of my major goals that I really had this breakthrough and it sank in.
I've had to look at my life on multiple occasions and really dig deep, to find out what was missing.
The breakthrough was to learn to enjoy the PROCESS of achieving my goals, not just the destination of the goal itself.
It was learning to enjoy all of the LITTLE THINGS in life, not just the big things. I've learned too really teach myself to find happiness and joy in every moment of every day, even in the activities that I used to not particularly enjoy.
You Can Be Happy RIGHT NOW!
You don't have to wait for a moment in the future when everything is perfect.
You don't have to wait until you make a million dollars, quit your job, buy that house or car, find that perfect relationship, or when you finally retire. Again, this is deluding yourself into believing that something has to HAPPEN in order for you to be happy. Don't buy into that, it's a lie.
If you aren't already happy RIGHT NOW in your life, then there's no reason to believe you will be happy in the future.
You can be happy right now, simply by deciding.
YOU control how you feel, nobody else does. YOU decide and determine what every moment of your life means. YOU have the power to look for the good, be grateful and experience happiness in any moment of your life, despite the circumstances or what's going on around you.
How?
There's many ways of doing it.
You could incorporate new rituals in your life where you ask yourself new questions throughout your day to change what you focus on.
Whatever you focus on you feel. If you focus on how to be happy right now or think about what's great about this moment, you will start to feel and experience happiness.
For example, start by asking yourself these questions…
What are you happy about RIGHT NOW in your life?
… If your brain comes up with a blank, then ask yourself, what COULD you be happy RIGHT NOW if you really wanted to be?
If you can't think of anything, then it just goes to show how messed up your conditioning really is.
Most of us are so selective in what we focus on that could bring us happiness and joy. Again, we're programmed to look for the “big things” and focus on all that we don't have in our lives, instead of what we do have.
Here's some answers that I came up with really quick, that I'm happy about in my life:
- I'm so happy and grateful that I have my health!
- I'm so happy for every part of my body… my eyes, my nose, my ears, my face, my brain, my heart, my arms, legs, and EVERY PART OF MYSELF that gives me the ability to experience the life that my creator has given me.
- I'm so happy to live in one of the greatest cities in the world.
- I'm so happy to be alive during this time in history and get to enjoy the benefits of the hard work and sacrifice others have done before me.
- I'm so happy to have an amazing family and friends that are supportive and loving.
- I'm so happy to have the ability to exercise each day and improve my body.
- I'm so happy that I get to use this incredible tool called the internet that allows me to find answers to any question that I have.
- I'm so happy that I have the ability to share and influence others through the internet and my blog.
- I'm so happy to have clean, healthy water and an abundance of food.
- I'm so happy to have the freedom to make decisions in my life and create the future I want.
Get the idea?
In my answers, I didn't mention owning a new Corvette Stingray, or living in a $1.7 million dollar penthouse, or making tons of money.
No, instead I've learned to focus on and find happiness in all of the little things in life.
You know… all of the little things that are actually the IMPORTANT THINGS that most of us take for granted.
I've learned to appreciate and be grateful for everything in my life, every moment of every day. To really soak in every experience and moment of life. To ENJOY the process, the journey and live for today… as tomorrow is not promised to us.
YOU HAVE IT ALL RIGHT NOW!
The truth is, you have it all right now. You are already abundant and have everything that you need in order to be happy RIGHT NOW.
Instead of complaining about your job or feeling upset about not being where you want to be, why not focus on the good that already exists in your life right now?
It's there, you just have to find it and constantly focus on it. You have to re-program yourself and make this your new way of being.
Make a ritual out of it. Condition yourself constantly to be happy and eventually it'll become your new default way of being.
Start a morning ritual as the first thing when you wake up tomorrow. End your day with an evening ritual.
Begin with a smile and end with a smile.
Keep that smile all throughout your day – on that drive to work, while you're working, walking down the street, while you're watching TV, and in everything that you do. Just changing your physiology that way will help you learn to enjoy this moment and release endorphins to your brain.
While you're driving to work or at your job or doing whatever it is that you're doing, ask yourself…
“How can I be happy right now?”
“How can I enjoy this moment even more right now?”
“How can I really be passionate about what I'm doing right now?”
If you ask your brain these questions, it will come up with the answers. If you can't come up with the answers, then you need to stop being a perfectionist and train yourself to look for the small things. It's the little things that will give you the joy and fulfillment that you're really looking for in your life.
If you can really own this concept and start to live it, your life will transform. You will begin to LOVE each day of your life and your happiness won't be determined by a moment in the future. Rather, you will be happy and fulfilled right now!
It's my hope that this video blog helps to break your old conditioning in some way and inspire you to feel happy right now.
Perhaps you already know this and are already living it – if so, congratulations! Sometimes we all need this reminder and need to get associated to the truth again, as it's easy to get caught back up in our old ways of being.