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How To Overcome Fear And Change Your Life

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how to overcome fearI wanted to share a quick video today on how to USE fear, instead of having fear use and control you. This little tool is something I’ve used throughout the last several years to change my life and overcome the fear that paralyzes most from taking action in their life.

If you find yourself procrastinating or knowing you SHOULD be doing something, but just aren’t doing it – then this secret on how to overcome fear will definitely benefit you. It’s the secret that gets me to follow through consistently everyday towards my goals, gets me outside of my comfort zone, and taking massive action towards the life I want. It’s what gets me to the gym everyday, eating consistently healthy, to approach and interact with that stranger, or to just buckle down and build my businesses.

Watch the video blog below on how to overcome fear and change your life:

(Click here to watch the video on YouTube)

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This has been the secret for me to having lasting motivation.

how to overcome fear change your lifeAnytime you’re procrastinating or not following through on something, it’s because you don’t have enough LEVERAGE on yourself.  You’re avoiding facing the truth and being 100% honest with yourself, so instead you say things to yourself like, “I can do it later” or “It’s not that important” or “I don’t feel like it” or whatever B.S. story you tell yourself.

It’s not until you say, “WAIT… that’s bullshit.  What will it cost me in my life if I don’t do this?  What’s the ultimate consequence?”

When you face that reality, you will have a rude awakening and get your butt into gear towards doing whatever you need to do.

We’re all driven by PAIN and PLEASURE.  We’ll do almost anything to AVOID pain, and anything to GAIN pleasure.

If you’re not doing something, it’s because you’re associating PAIN to doing it.  Instead, why not associate the PAIN to not doing it?  If you think about it, the pain of being over-weight and having low energy and getting a serious disease FAR OUTWEIGHS the temporarily pleasure and satisfaction you will get by eating that cookie.  But when you eat that cookie, you are only thinking about the pleasure, instead of looking at the consequences of eating it.

Here’s the questions to ask yourself to get leverage:

1. What will it cost me in my life if I continue living this way?

2. What is the ultimate consequence?

3. What will it cost me in emotionally, in my relationships, friendships, family, finances, health, spiritual life?

4. What will I have to give up or miss out on by living this way?

5. What have I already missed out on?  What has it already cost me in my life?

6. What will it cost me 5 years, 10 years, 15 years, 20 years from now if I continue living this way?

Alternatively, you can also ask pleasure-enducing questions to associate PLEASURE to doing whatever it is that you want.

Here’s some pleasure-enducing questions to get leverage:

1. What will I gain by doing this?

2. How is this going to move me closer towards my dreams and who I want to become?

3. How will doing this add to every area of my life?  My relationships? Emotional life? Finances? Health?  etc…

4. What will my life be like 5, 10, 15, 20 years from now by doing this?

The trick is to make sure that you’re consistently asking yourself these questions throughout the day.

If you find yourself still not consistently doing it, it’s simply because you’re not getting enough leverage on yourself.  I’ve had times in my life where I broke down in tears and experienced massive pain, until I hit what I call “Emotional Threshold” and that’s when things clicked and I transformed.

I didn’t hit emotional threshold by intellectually thinking of the pain or pleasure, instead I really made sure that I FELT IT at my core – I experienced the pain/pleasure fully, which is what propelled me to make the change permanent.

Today, there are things that I will NEVER AGAIN indulge in because it’s far too painful for me to go back – things like video games, sitting around watching TV, binge eating, depression, being lazy or procrastinating.

The truth is, you should be MORE AFRAID of those destructive habits than doing what you need to do.

The truth will set you free.

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  • Simone

    Thanks Stefan, your blog has helped me so much. I’ve been through all of your blog posts and videos… took me a few hours, but I have received so much content and information for free from you. Thanks, you are an incredible human being.

    • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

      Thanks for the kind words Simone. It really inspires me to keep going with this and to reach more people.

  • Gary Hickey

    Another awesome blog post Stef.

  • Taylor

    This is sooo true, how people don’t face the truth because they are scared and its too painful. I have been there so many times, wow. The pain and pleasure principle you talk about is bang on, something I need to use more often to get myself to follow through.

  • Ranillankagmacc

    First of all I would like to thank you which is about you have been expressed the important fact for the people and the make people mind to living with happy and simply. Fear would be the main fact to the people to break or slow down the persons success. Any person need to be success he/she need to be good resister for the fear. In that case your information is very helpful to the people(and me) to overcome fear and facing the challenges strongly.

     

  • Linzy

    Reassessing fear and shifting the focus from the short term pangs attached to ones fears, while paying more attention to the long term consequences. This blog is quite innovative and effective in the sense that it applies simple language to express specific ideas in which general procrastinators relate with. I am saving this video and sharing it with friends :)

  • Anatpaz

    I use my feers like challenges, and I love challenges

  • Kaloakashbd

    I am also agreed with him.If we dont try ourselves and face the reality we wont be able lose fear.After all thanks for posting such kind of post. 

  • Kathryntodd7389

    The hardest part will always be accepting the hole or rut you are in. When you hit rock bottom, you have to understand and realize that you are there and accept it, before you can begin to improve your lifestyle. Believe it or not,l the best way to help yourself is to want it. Once you know you want it you will find the ambition to change it. people will always want to help you if you want to help yourself. You have to keep your faith and will to improve your life. You can do it.

  • Ahabulhasan

    Thanks a lot Stefan.Your blog has carried me so much.I have been through all of your blog post and videos. It has given me so much content and information free from you.You are a super human being. So thanks again.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Hassan-Ahmed/100003689468448 Hassan Ahmed

    Very good and awesome posts it realy help me to solve my problem thanks

  • Jakirul

    This is very good article. I want to read more article about this topic. Thanks for your article

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Vijay-Kumar/100002412212635 Vijay Kumar

    verry good post asowem and is the best

  • Nicolas

    Excellent post, this is one of the best posts I’v ever read.

  • http://www.mmask.qa/ Jobs in Qatar | Qatar Jobs

    Very informative post, it is completely right that truth is
    very painful and everyone ignore it however if you realize your weaknesses and
    away to them from your life your life become successful.

    • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

      Glad you enjoyed it!

  • RandomDude

    dude you rock ! keep on doing what you’re doing , am so going to the gym right now ! it’s like reading “awaken the giant within by robert greene”

    • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

      Thanks, glad you’re inspired! I think you mean by Awaken The Giant Within by Tony Robbins!

  • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

    Thank you!

  • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

    Thanks, glad you have benefitted from my posts and videos!

  • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

    Great inspirational words right here, thanks for sharing.

  • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

    Great perspective.

  • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

    Great, thanks!

  • http://www.ProjectLifeMastery.com/ Stefan Pylarinos

    Glad I was able to help.

  • Jaivir Baweja

    Good job on sharing your success with others and being phenomenal. This blogpost helped me realize why I am not motivated despite having a dream; the association of pain to doing instead of to not doing it. Keep up the good work.

  • http://inviewmarketing.ca Jeff | In View Marketing

    Would enjoy you touching more on the Binge eating you went thru and where you are today in relationship to sugar and sweets etc. Have you ever gone back to scarfing down food like that again?

  • Ankush

    I saw this video about overcoming fear last night. My condition is currently the same. I’m 17. Addicted to food and video games. And introverted. Your video has changed my mindset. Thank You!