The stories in your head will either push you forward in life or pull you back.
Your inner narrative has a direct impact on your experience of life. If you tend to be self-critical, you aren't alone. A lot of people are their own worst critics.
The good news is that you can always re-write your story because you are the author of your life. Limiting beliefs can be transformed into empowering ones.
In the words of Deepak Chopra, “Change your story, change your life. Basically, that's what it is.” Are you ready to let go of the negative stories that you tell yourself?
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Your mind loves to make up stories about who you are.
Take a moment and think about the things that you tell yourself on a daily basis. Would speak to your friends in the same way that you speak to yourself? Your answer may shock you. Each of us has a negative voice.
You know that pesky inner critic that tries to tell you all of the reasons why you aren't good enough? This voice is based on beliefs that weren't even yours in the first place. It is near impossible to grow up in society without absorbing the words that are spoken by your parents, teachers, or friends. As a result, you may have taken on others' stories and called them your own. The fact of the matter is that your thoughts greatly influence how you think, feel and behave.
The stories you tell yourself end up defining your life. If your thoughts are negative in nature, you will attract negative things into your life. It's that simple. At the end of the day, it is up to you whether or not you are ready to shift the thoughts and beliefs that are no longer serving your highest self. You are the main character of your life story, which means that you have the power to change the narrative.
Resisting your emotional blocks will only further complicate your life.
Research shows that echoing negative thoughts inside our heads increases our chances of depression, isolates us from others, and inhibits us from pursuing goals. I'm here to tell that you don't need to get to this point. For those of you who follow my work and life, you know that I struggled with anxiety and depression for many years. Those were dark times.
The worst advice I've ever received was being told that I should just continue being myself. If I had done this, my life would have never changed. I would have continued to be a shy, depressed, and lonely person.
Eventually, I hit my emotional threshold because I was done not feeling like I was in control of my life. The time had come to upgrade everything about who I was. I'm a firm believer that change of any kind starts and ends with a decision. I decided that I didn't want to be a victim anymore. I can firmly say that rewriting my narrative was the best decision I've ever made.
The world of personal growth and development taught me how to see my story, in particular, how to feel the discomfort of it. I learned how to work with my negative thoughts so that I could become the master of them. Once I changed my story about who I was, everything else changed.
Where a lot of people get stuck is that they think it's best to ignore the voice inside their head. I'm here to tell you that this is one of the worst mistakes that you can make. Uncovering your stories helps you understand who you are on a deeper level. More importantly, it can help you find your purpose in life.
Let's talk about 3 ways to silence the negative voice inside your head.
1. Develop An Awareness Of Your Thoughts
If you believe that all of your thoughts are true, your emotions will take you on a roller coaster ride. Don't put yourself through that torture. According to Michigan State University Extension’s Stress Less with Mindfulness program, a person has 80,000 thoughts a day. Ninety percent of these thoughts are ones we have had before, and 80 percent of these are negative.
These statistics prove that negative thinking simply comes with the territory of being a human being, but that doesn't mean that we can't take action to change our thinking. There will always be challenges in life. The trick is learning how to change your relationship to your environment, while also changing the narrative about who you are.
Luckily, with intentional practice, you can challenge your negative thoughts and change the way that your brain thinks. The best way that I know how to do this is through mindfulness. When you connect with what awareness really is, you begin to realize that your thoughts aren't even yours.
I encourage you to commit to engaging in a 5-minute seated meditation every morning. Find a comfortable seated position, close your eyes and pay attention to the sensations in your body, most importantly, your breath. If your mind stays busy, that's OK. The goal isn't to shut off your thoughts. Rather, just pay attention to where your thoughts wander to. With this recognition comes the freedom to choose not to believe the negative stories that play out in your head.
2. Identify Triggers To Your Negative Thinking
You may not be aware of it, but there are things in your daily environment that trigger negative emotions inside of you. Negative thoughts are nothing more than bad habits, and any habit can be changed with hard work, commitment, and focus.
In her book, The Science of Positivity: Stop Negative Thought Patterns by Changing Your Brain Chemistry, Loretta Graziano says that we tend to dwell on criticisms (while brushing off compliments), and brace ourselves for the worst possible outcomes, but that it doesn't have to be that way.
In order to overcome negative thought patterns, you have to be willing to identify the deeper reason why these patterns continue to show up in your life. Instead of falling into a reactive state every time something upsets you, make a list of the events that triggered that negative emotion.
Speak to these negative thoughts and ask them questions. As Frances McIntosh says, “Let your internal voice say, I’m recognizing a negative thought; it’s a story I’m telling myself, and it’s not true.” When you are able to identify your negative triggers, you become empowered to take action and eliminate them. Become the observer of your life, as it unfolds in front of you. This is the point at which you reclaim your power.
3. Turn Your Inner Critic Into A Coach
Your inner critic feeds off of negativity and dark energy. It has you believe that who you are is not enough, which is so far from true. Don't buy into these lies. Try shifting your relationship with your inner critic. Instead of seeing the critic as something bad, see it as a coach that exists to challenge and motivate you to become more.
Feelings of fear, worry, and doubt are merely signposts that are touching on something important for your personal growth and development. Do an experiment and try listening to the meaning hidden behind your inner critic's words. When you do, you will start to become the master of your thoughts. Over time, your critic will transform into one of your greatest allies.
In the words of William James, “Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.”
Are you ready to let the stories go?
You are either the hero of your story or the victim of it. When you take the appropriate steps to face your thoughts and begin the process of developing a more healthy relationship with them, you become free to be your true self.
Is there anything more empowering? Absolutely not.
Do you want to learn how you can create an empowering morning ritual? CLICK HERE to join my Morning Ritual Mastery program!
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