If you don't believe in yourself, then nobody will ever believe in you.
When I was young, I had extremely low self-esteem. I didn't believe that I could be anyone or do anything important. As a result, I did what other people said I should do. I was constantly seeking approval and validation.
It's hard to believe in yourself if you spend all of your time trying to live up to other people’s expectations.
Now is the time to transform fear and self-doubt into unstoppable confidence and self-esteem.
Watch the video below where I talk about why I dropped out of college:
(Click here to watch on YouTube)
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Do you believe in yourself?
This question is not meant to patronize you. Rather, it's only meant to empower you. If you have self-doubt, great! That means that you are human. We all have moments in life when we need to believe in ourselves a little more.
Sometimes we get knocked down by life and it takes away our faith in who we are and what we are capable of achieving. However, it's during your weakest moments that you need to pull upon your strength and remind yourself how strong you really are.
When you think about it… nothing is impossible, but our minds try to tell us otherwise. People come from nothing every single day and go on to achieve great feats in life. Why? They have developed an unwavering belief in their capabilities. In his book, The Biology of Belief: Unleashing The Power Of Consciousness, Matter And Miracles, Bruce Lipton suggests that our beliefs and perceptions create our biological makeup. Who you believe you are is who you end up becoming.
Where people get into trouble is that they allow other peoples' criticisms and judgments to define who they are. You cannot control what other people think. I learned this the hard way when I was younger, but I learned it nonetheless. When I was a teenager, I was bullied.
In order to protect myself, I built up a wall around myself to the point where I became invisible. This was my mechanism to avoid experiencing anymore hurt or pain. I carried on my life as if others did not impact me, but the bare truth is that they did. What I didn't know then that I do know now is that there will always be someone who will try to tear you down.
It's up to you to decide whether or not you will allow peoples' behaviors to affect your life.
The reason why I have achieved so much success in my life is that I routinely ignore the noise of others' judgments and opinions. More importantly, I never stopped believing in myself. I planted a seed, worked really hard and watered it every single day. The words, “I can” became my life anthem.
It's amazing how a simple shift in your narrative can change the course of your entire life. If someone has achieved something great, there's no reason why you can't as well. The only thing that matters is what YOU believe is possible.
Here are 4 strategies that you can start implementing today that will help you flex your belief muscle.
1. Step Outside Your Comfort Zone
Your comfort zone is your enemy. It may feel safe, but nothing ever grows there. As a society, you are conditioned to seek out comfort and avoid pain. If you cannot deal with discomfort, you are only going to hold yourself back in life. Self-growth builds confidence and allows you to look fear in the eye and give it a wink.
Research by brain scientist Gregory Berns of Emory University School of Medicine shows that the two key factors in long-term life satisfaction are novelty and challenge. Your needs aren't going to be met by staying comfortable. Rather, it's only when you are willing to risk everything and break free from your routine, that you will experience a sense of gratification.
I'm not going to sugar coat it… the act of striving for success is not a comfortable experience. If you want to achieve success, you've got to get comfortable being uncomfortable. The only way that you truly step into your power is by stretching yourself.
As Dan Stevens said – “The comfort zone is the great enemy to creativity; moving beyond it necessitates intuition, which in turn configures new perspectives and conquers fears.” By confronting your fears and doing things that scare you, you challenge your belief about what is possible.
2. Quiet Your Inner Critic
We've all been faced with that pesky voice inside of our heads that tries to tell us that we aren't good enough, smart enough or successful enough. Your inner critic does a fantastic job at keeping you safe from harm, but it does an equally fantastic job at encouraging you to doubt yourself and your abilities.
Unfortunately, a lot of people assume that these thoughts must be true simply because they are thinking about them. If you are struggling to believe in yourself, it's highly likely that your inner critic is in the driver's seat. If you leave this voice unchecked, it will start to create a mental pattern of negative comments that can wreak havoc on your life.
This is why you need to start questioning everything that your inner critic says. One way of doing this is by looking for evidence to support or deny what this negative voice is telling you. Doing so will allow you to challenge or replace irrational thought patterns that don't serve you with more empowering ones that do.
3. Don't Settle For Mediocrity
I want you to be honest with yourself… who's life are you living? If it's not yours, it's time to get real and ask yourself why. Too many people give up on their dreams because they are too busy living someone else's life. As a result, they never realize their true potential in life.
Don't ever settle for mediocrity. If someone says that something can't be done, be the first person to prove them wrong. Your dreams matter and you deserve to aim as high as you possibly can. Commit to becoming the person that others aspire to, the person who is willing to give it his or her all, despite odds being stacked against him or her.
No matter what, don't surrender at the first sign of defeat. Yes, during the process of working towards your goals, you will encounter a lot of challenges and failures. However, these moments will provide you with golden opportunities to bear witness to the greatness that lies within you. Who do you want to be? Hold onto that vision and spend every waking moment of your life doing the work to embody that person.
4. Talk To Yourself Like A Winner
From the first moment that you wake up in the morning, you have a choice about how your day is going to flow. You can either bombard your mind with negative thoughts about who you are, or you can think empowering and uplifting thoughts that motivate you to achieve more. Which path sounds better? Unfortunately, a lot of people don't think that they have a choice, to begin with. They assume that self-deprecation is, and will always be, a part of who they are.
The fact of the matter is that nobody is born with low self-worth. You come into this world with a positive, “can do” outlook. Unfortunately, people come along and consume your mind with negative thinking, so much so, that you stop believing in yourself.
You start to take on self-defeating beliefs that weren't even yours. These beliefs become your thoughts, which then become the words that you speak. It's fair to say that negative self-talk can drastically affect your confidence and self-esteem. When you think the worst about yourself, that's exactly what you end up creating in your life.
The good news is that, with positive self-talk, you can over-write that negative voice that lives inside your head. Your inner critic can't survive on positivity. When events happen in your life that are viewed as negative, positive self-talk swoops in and reframes the situations, so that you are able to find the good amidst the bad.
The next time that you practice positive self-talk, don’t refer to yourself as “I.” Instead, refer to yourself as “he” or “she.” Current research shows that second-person self-talk strengthens both actual behavior performance and prospective behavioral intentions more than first-person self-talk.
When you talk to yourself as if you are a winner, you embody that truth. The good news is that this has always been your natural state. Somewhere along the way, you may have lost yourself, but you can always get that positive person back.
Anything is possible, but only if you believe it is.
At the end of the day, you’re the only person that can truly believe in yourself. Don't allow yourself to be your own worst enemy. If you have days when you forget what you are capable of, remember T. Harv Eker's words – “If you are insecure, guess what? The rest of the world is too. Do not overestimate the competition and underestimate yourself. You are better than you think.”
Believe in yourself. If you don't, who will?
Do you want to learn how you can master every area of your life? CLICK HERE to join my Life Mastery Accelerator program!