I've got another video for you today, this time from the Galapagos Islands in Ecuador. I've been receiving a ton of e-mails from people with certain questions and have just been getting around to answer some of them in the form of a video blog. Today I respond to an e-mail from Denise on “how to stop drinking”.
Watch the video below:
Raise Your Standards
In order for you to make any change in your life, it's going to require you to raising your standards. In the case of Denise who wants to stop drinking, she needs to have a standard for herself that isn't going to be affected by the opinions of her peers. If she continues to let her peers influence her decisions and standards, she'll never make the change long-term.
As I talked about in my Empowering Ecosystem video blog, the people you surround yourself influence you more than anything in your life. The reason for that, is we're usually always in need of our peers approval and don't want to lose their love. That's why we usually become like who we spend the time with most.
You can either change your environment, which is what I mention below, or to have a higher standard than your peers. For me personally, I've had many events in my life where I had to raise my standards and expectations for myself higher than my peers. One example is when I competed in the WBFF fitness competition and spent months intensely training and following a strict diet. I wanted an incredible physique and it required sacrifices. I was put under the scrutiny and judgement of others when I'd go to restaurants or out with friends. Eating unhealthy foods or drinking wasn't an option for me, and I wasn't going to let my peers affect the standard I had set for myself in a negative way.
Having to raise your standards above your peers is something that is required if you want to make any lasting change in your life. There will always be some negative influences in your life or people that may judge you for your decisions, but you can't let that affect you, whether it be your family or friends. What's important to understand is that people with high standards get HIGH REWARDS. And with those high rewards, other people will look up to you and be inspired by how you're living your life and the results you've achieved. For me personally, I'd rather be THAT person than the person that has low standards and settles for mediocrity.
Change Your Environment
One of the fastest ways to change is by changing your environment. If you want to stop drinking, and your peers go out drinking on a regular basis, it's going to be very challenging to change. The same goes if you want to lose weight, but meanwhile all of your friends are overweight. You're going AGAINST what the standards of the group are. The people in your group will most likely oppose what you're doing, as it will make them feel inferior in some way.
I remember back when I was shy and introverted, I was eager to make some changes in my life to become more social and confident. The challenge was that at the time my friends were similar to me. We'd normally just spend our weekends at my friends place playing video games and not interacting with anyone or going out. If I suggested to my friends, “Hey let's go out this weekend!”, they would look at me like I was crazy or ridicule me for it. Or if I was out with them and attempted to approach a girl I was interested in, they'd most likely make fun of me if it didn't go well. The changes I would make simply wouldn't be supported by them, as again, it'd make them feel inferior in some way.
The change that I made that turned my life around was finding people that were like how I wanted to be. I found individuals that had the confidence, self-esteem, social skills, success, health, fitness, relationships, etc… that I WANTED. These individuals lived by a totally different standard than my other friends. And as a result of being around these new high-level individuals, my standards raised up to theirs and I began making significant changes in my life, as well as incredible results.
Change your environment, change our life.
It can be a very challenging decision to make, but it's been worth it for me in my life. The energy that is required to bring people up to your level is draining and usually not worth the effort. That's why one of the most important qualities I look for in people is people that are willing to grow and have an open-mind. I want my peers to grow with me and be constantly evolving, that way we're constantly learning from and supporting each other towards our visions of who we want to be.
It's worth taking a look at your current environment and asking yourself some of the hard questions. Are these people supportive of my vision and goals? Are they the type of people that I want to be like? Are they potentially holding me back? It may take facing a reality you're uncomfortable with or making some difficult decisions, but sometimes that's necessary if you want to live the life you're committed to.