How To Develop Grit: The Hard Thing Rule


how to develop grit

I want to share with you how to develop grit, and integrate something called, ‘the hard thing rule' into your daily life.

Do you know someone who views challenges as opportunities for growth?  Do you know someone that always appears to be successful in the face of adversity?

Have you ever wondered why these people are the way they are?

In her book, “Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance”, Angela Duckworth has a theory for why these people exist.  The answer is that they possess grit.

In her book, Angela shares her decade of research on the topic, and determines that grit is what separates those that are successful from those who fail.

Watch the video below:

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Do you want to learn more about how to develop grit? CLICK HERE to check out Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance on Amazon.

According to Angela, grit, as defined as a child’s “perseverance and passion for long-term goals,” is a better indicator of future earnings and happiness, than either IQ or talent.

Angela is constantly asked by parents, “How do you build grit in kids?” In her research, she has found that unconditional love is important for children, but you cant overdo it.

A lot of parents try to protect their children from challenges and adversity, but that’s not how life works.

She believes that children need to be challenged so that they learn how to adapt to change and bounce back from adversity.

Angela explains that there are two different ways of building grit – there is an internal approach and an external approach.

The external approach is through role models, coaches, mentors, etc.  The internal approach is about developing your passion and by experimenting with a variety of different things.

Her argument is, that if you are passionate about something, you are more likely to be able to cope with challenges in your daily life.

Your passion and perseverance towards your long-term goals helps you move through difficult times with strength.

In her book, Angela shares a great technique that can help you cultivate grit, and that you can incorporate into your daily routine.

It’s something that she calls, “the hard thing rule”.  It’s a ritual, where, every single day, you have to do one hard thing.

Angela believes that this is how you develop grit.  The reality is that you don’t grow by doing comfortable things. You get stronger by stepping out of your comfort zone.

“The hard thing rule” is something that everyone can and should incorporate into their daily lives.

In the words of Eleanor Roosevelt, “Do one thing every day that scares you”.

Ask yourself, “What can you do today that is going to challenge you?”

Every day is an opportunity to perform one small act of bravery that has the potential to change the course of your life.

Its time to take the plunge!

Video transcript

Hey everyone, Stefan here from projectlifemastery.com. In this video, I'm going to share with you guys how to develop, build, and cultivate grit. I recently read a great book calledGrit by Angela Duckworth. I shared a lot of the book on my Snapchat as I was reading the book. It's actually a book that you guys voted on on my Snapchat that you guys thought I should read it. I want to share with you guys how to develop grit.

It's a really great book by a psychologist, Angela Duckworth, that shares her study of success and determining what makes a difference between someone who's successful and someone that isn't. She goes and she studies the National Spelling Bee students and participants of that that win. Studying in a West Point, the Military Academy and professional athletes and all that sort of stuff, and she determines that grit is something that separates people that are successful from those that fail.

She talks about perseverance, and passion, and how it's more important than talent. A lot of people, they're so obsessed with talent and they don't realize that your perseverance and your passion is more powerful than that, because if you have that, you're going to bring out more the talent that you already have.

How do you build grit?

She basically explains, there are two different ways of going about it. There's the internal way, and then there's the external approach. The internal approach is developing your passion by experimenting with many different things, because if you're passionate about something, you're going to be grittier with that. If you're passionate about something, then you're going to be able to get past all the adversity and challenges just because the passion will pull you through.

There's a great technique that she shares that can help you cultivate the grit to improving yourself every day to a ritual that you can have. It's something that you can incorporate into your daily routine. What that ritual is, is something that she calls the hard thing rule. The hard thing rule. The hard thing rule is basically a ritual where every single day, you've got to do a hard thing.

Every day, you're going to do a hard thing, because that's how you build grit. You don't build grit by doing things that are easy, or convenient, or comfortable. That doesn't build your grit. It's like building a muscle. You don't build a muscle by lifting a lightweight that you can lift a hundred times. You build your muscle by pushing yourself beyond what your current comfort zone is, what's currently within your limitation. You push beyond that, and that's how you get stronger. That's how you grow.

The hard thing rule is basically the same premise; is that every day, you're going to do something that's hard. You're going to do something that's outside your comfort zone. That could be anything. It could be going to the gym and push yourself a little bit further. Actually making your workout a hard workout so that you grow and you develop that grit. You got to push yourself past it.

It could be when you meditate each day. Meditating a little bit longer. Pushing yourself. Meditating. Getting past 5 minutes, or 10 minutes, and trying to control your thoughts. That can help build up your grit. Maybe it's in your business and pushing yourself a little bit further. Doing something that you're scared to do. Maybe it's getting up in front of a camera and speaking. Maybe it's writing. Maybe writing is hard for you. Your English isn't as good, but you push yourself a little bit further. Every day, you're building your grit.

The hard thing rule

It can be many different things, but the point is to do something hard. In the book, Angela Duckworth is constantly asked by parents saying, “How do you raise your kids?” “How do you build gritty kids?” Because what she studied and determined is that unconditional love for kids is important, but you can't overdo it because a lot of kids if you just … A lot of parents, for example, they try to protect their kids. They don't want them to go through any adversity or challenges. They want everything just to be a smooth sailing life for them.

That's not how the real world works, because if you just shower your kids with unconditional love and then once they grow to become adults, they're going to get destroyed in real life. They're going to get destroyed because they're not going to know how to deal with adversity. They're not going to have the grit to be able to deal with it.

The hard thing rule is what she recommends for kids. You want to teach your kids, and every day, you got to do something hard to build grit. You want to give them that unconditional love, but also, you want to challenge them. You want them to go to adversity, and failure, and struggle, and to figure out the answers on their own so that they can develop their grit and be able to have more perseverance in their life.

The hard thing rule guys, it's what I want to share with you guy today. That's the internal way of building grit. The external way is through coaches, and mentors, and role models, and people that can push you. I believe in having that as well. I've had coaches for many years in my life, but the hard thing rule is a great standard to live by. It's something that you should incorporate to your life and ask yourself, “What is one thing I could do today that's going to be hard, that's going to be challenging?”

Make sure that you commit yourself to do it

It's all relative based on every human being, because what's hard for you might be easy for someone else. You can't compare yourself to others. You got to make sure that whatever it is that you're doing every day, that you're committing to, is a challenge for you. In doing so, you're going to build your muscle, you're going to build your grit, and your capacity to be able to do more.

That's it for this video guys. Thank you guys so much for watching. Make sure to hit the thumbs up. Make sure to like the video. Subscribe for more videos and leave a comment. Of course, if you guys want to follow me on social media or find out more about me, then go to projectlifemastery.com, or click the links that are below in the description of this video. Thanks for watching guys. See you in the next video.

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How To Develop Grit: The Hard Thing Rule
4.5 (90%) 10 votes
  • Another awesome article, Stefan! You can’t believe how much I learn by just visiting PLM once a day. Thanks as always.

  • Christian Jose Figueroa

    Stefan what is the secret to taking action?